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Whether one is striking up a conversation at a coffee shop or tallying up proximity points with a potential love interest, geography matters in large ways and small.Not fretting about an hourlong postdate commute allows drinks to turn into dinner, for instance.The dating scene is so frenetic, some people weary of it, including those who fail to meet someone despite what would appear to be every conceivable opportunity.“It can be hard, it can be draining. Huerta, 40, a dentist, moved to Hell’s Kitchen recently after nine years in the East Village.My roommate jokes about JOMO — the joy of missing out,” Ms. But the ceaseless courtship ritual has provided fodder for “Soon by You,” a web series she produces and acts in about dating in the community. He left an apartment share to be closer to his then-boyfriend, his friends and the practice he had just started.She worked in finance and dated “meatheads who wore baggy jeans ripped at the bottom and didn’t want to do anything but drink beer and watch football.”After ending a long-term relationship with one such meathead, she left her job to go to business school and moved to 1 North Fourth, a luxury rental on the waterfront in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, which suits her perfectly.
The New York neighborhoods with the highest ratio of single women to single men, ages 20 to 34, are the Upper East Side (0.6 men to every woman), Murray Hill (0.68), the Upper West Side (0.79) and Brownsville, Brooklyn (0.8) according to 2014 data from the American Community Survey compiled by the city’s Economic Development Corporation.“And I consider myself a social person.”Though not opposed to online dating, she felt out of place in family-friendly Washington Heights and found her forays to Midtown and Lower East Side bars disappointing, the men standoffish. I don’t want an hour-and-a-half obstacle just to grab a coffee.Then one day, a friend texted her to come to happy hour at Rambling House, an Irish pub in the Woodlawn neighborhood of the Bronx. I don’t want to end up coming back at midnight on some train that stalls in the station because of an investigation.”Nancy Slotnick, a dating coach, said that proximity was crucial for many single New Yorkers.Based on that data, the New York City Economic Development Corporation declared the neighborhood “an attractive spot for all young singles” in 2014. The area “is not such a good spot for single people,” said Mirsad Kadribasic, 41, an owner of La Bohème Lounge on Stillwell Avenue in Bensonhurst, which on a recent Friday night was half-filled with couples smoking hookahs at velvet banquettes. It’s not like Park Slope, where people are hanging out all the time.”Though it may be the envy of Bensonhurst, the Park Slope dating scene did not impress Robert Di Biase when he moved there from Washington, D. When his aging bulldog compelled him to trade his walk-up for an elevator building, he seized on the opportunity and rented a one-bedroom on the Lower East Side, a quick walk to local favorites like Stanton Social or Mr. She later found out that he had come into the cafe where she was an owner just the day before. “When you’re in the same neighborhood you get that chance over and over again.”But Michael J.“I’m a single person myself and I can’t meet anyone here.“It’s a middle-class neighborhood. Rosenfeld, a Stanford University sociology professor who researches how couples meet, said that meeting in the neighborhood, along with meeting through family, friends, co-workers, school and church, had declined since the 1990s, largely because of the rise of online dating.
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A bar filled with friends may bestow the confidence to initiate a conversation with a stranger, which in turn may lead to the confidence to approach some other stranger, at some other bar, on some other night.